The Ladybug Effect

I was sitting down one day when a ladybug landed on me... It was just a ladybug. Harmless. And if anything, kind of cute. So why then did I nearly jump out of my chair when it flew on to my arm? It didn't bite me (because I'm not even sure ladybugs can bite) all it did was sit there. I thought about it... and it made me wonder, why was I so scared? Not just of ladybugs, but everything else too... Why did I shoo away all the ladybugs in my life before I even knew what they were? I was scared of the ladybug because I thought it might be another cockroach (because one time a cockroach climbed on my arm which terrified the living daylights out of me), and in life, I guess the cockroach must have been fear. Past experiences that hadn't gone well.

I hate to think that I'm some wuss. But honestly, I don't like taking chances. I hate the possibilty of losing, failing, or maybe it's really just because I'm just too proud to look like a fool. Pride. It's a terrible thing I tell you. Anyways, but how are you suppose to find love if you're caught up from all its cockroaches. You know, like maybe if you'd been rejected or led on or something like that.. I mean there gets to be a point when you really need to stop analyzing everybody's motives and just live a little. Love's a ladybug if you come across the real kind anyway. I haven't really come to the solution just yet. I still get scared when a ladybug lands on me (for some odd reason there's a ton around my house). But I figure at least I'm at step one. I know the ladybugs are really ladybugs not cockroaches. Plus, there really are some good people out there who convince you life's pretty if you learn to leave behind all that junk in the past and keep moving foward.